Sandra De Tina
On November 24, 2007 Sandra De Tina, 41 year old mother of three, competed at the London & Western Ontario Bodybuilding, Fitness and Figure Championships. Sandra is a co-founding member of Mothers on Fire and we are excited to present her journey as our inaugural story.
MOF: What made you decide to enter this competition?
It all started four years ago when I joined a mothers’ life coaching group. I was a stay-at-home Mom and although I loved being home with my kids, I felt like something was missing. I was so busy and involved with my kids and husband that I had no time to think about what I wanted as a person, as an individual. I had no real dreams or desires and I was beginning to think I was boring. I was searching for something but didn’t know what it was. My life coaching group helped me identify and connect with the love for fitness and weight training that I lost since having kids. I had always exercised before becoming a Mom and loved the energy and balance it gave me. I continued to be active even after my first and second child. But once I had number three, it seemed harder to do and I eventually lost interest in staying fit. My life coaching group challenged and encouraged me to turn my love for fitness into a WIG (wildly incredible goal). When I first discovered my WIG, it felt amazing! It was so wild and crazy that I wanted it, but couldn’t imagine it possible. A 41-year-old mother of three entering a Figure Competition, who would do that? I was no athlete. I just liked to exercise. This goal was so outside of my comfort zone. But I knew it would challenge me physically and mentally as a person and a mother. It was what I needed to do to grow and transform as an individual. With the support and enthusiasm of my group, family and friends (and a lot of hard work and training), I achieved my goal.
MOF: Entering a Figure Competition takes a lot of work. Why did you do it?
I did it for me. I’d been watching my three kids develop and my husband thrive in his career while I remained the same. I wanted to change and grow too. I was so focused on being a good Mom and taking care of everyone else that I neglected to take care of me. I felt guilty just thinking of doing things for me. I thought I was selfish if I took time for myself.
MOF: What inspired you?
Once I started training, I was my own inspiration. I saw my body transform and my focus and energy rise. I was in my zone and nothing could stop me. I turned myself into an expert multi-tasker. I did it all, exercising 2-3 plus hours a day, cooking my ‘clean’ meals, taking care of the kids, laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, chauffeuring the kids, the list goes on… I made it happen because it felt good to focus on me. I loved this feeling and I didn’t want to let it go.
MOF: What was your biggest obstacle?
My biggest obstacle was fitting my fitness and nutrition program into my life. I had two school aged children, 6 and 7 years old, and a 3 year old that was in pre-school. How could I manage my responsibilities as a mother and find time to train? I initially thought I would have to change everything to make it work. I believed the only way to reach my goal was to follow the traditional bodybuilding approach of training and eating, which meant I had to think, act and eat like a bodybuilder. My life had to be extremely structured. I had to be focused and disciplined with no room for error. This program allowed no flexibility or spontaneity in my life. I followed the traditional bodybuilding approach for a few months, but struggled because it didn’t feel right. The plan was too structured and it didn’t allow me to be the mother/wife/friend that I was. I had less time with my kids and husband and I wasn’t happy. So I searched for a different way that worked for all of us and I found it. With the help of my Nutritionist and Trainer, we customized a program that fit perfectly into my lifestyle. I followed an intense weight training program and a controlled diet while still honouring my values. I worked out when the kids were at school or together with them. I ate my ‘clean’ food on schedule, but didn’t stress when we were out and I had a latte and a protein bar instead of chicken and broccoli. Once I discovered I could follow my fitness program without taking anything away from my family, I knew I could achieve my goal.
MOF: What did you learn?
I learned that I always need to do something for myself. Because of that, I feel more alive! I have more energy and balance in my life. I’m empowered to find another goal and go for it. I’ve inspired other people and taught my kids they too can achieve anything they set their mind to, if it is something they truly love. Being an inspiration really makes me feel good. As mothers, we tend to give to others and neglect ourselves. I now know I need to give to myself. I’ve put myself back on my priority list and I’m a happier person for it. And when Mama’s happy, everyone’s happy!
